The holidays. A time of joyous reunions, long overdue catch-ups, and wonderfully meaty conversations.

The holidays. A time of unwanted meetups, bitter memories of bygone days, and awkward faces I never wanted to see again.

The thought rankles of the bitter taste of hypocrisy. How can my heart be so small, and my pride hold onto such petty grudges, when I have tasted the sweetness of forgiveness and mercy from my Heavenly Father?

And even so, my heart tells me that I can’t let go.

But it’s something I do want to surrender. To be able to give second chances in the same way that I have been given a second chance. To stop blaming others for my woes and take responsibility for my own part in causing my pain. To share the testimony of the goodness of my Abba Father to those who had spent a large part of their lives serving Him, but never knowing Him intimately.

By myself, I know that it is impossible. In Christ, I know that I can. One step forward at a time.